Alcoholism...a cruel disease

 It's a horrible thing to watch an alcoholic ruin their health, career, potential. I have heard it is a true miracle when the obession to drink gets removed. It can happen, and does happen, to people around the world, every day. I'm praying that it happens for someone I know and love.

Studies show you can't get them sober. The only person who can get an alcoholic sober is the alcoholic him/herself.

Also, never try to reason with a drunk.  The logic side of their brain is completely PICKLED!  Next time I get a call I will just LISTEN ...or HANG UP.

"Forgive yourself and you will be free"...Marcia & Carol

Self-Forgiveness

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Can You Stop a Person from Drinking Themselves to Death...

What NOT to do

1. Do NOT try to confront the person while they are drunk. You will get nowhere.

2. Do NOT confront the person with accusations or threats. These will be met with deaf ears and denial.

3. Do NOT try to shame the person into stopping -- for the sake of their wife/husband, kids, parents, work, or whatever. Sad to say, the person's love and loyalty are no match for the powerful urge to drink that controls his brain and body.

4. Do NOT try to control the drinker's drinking yourself. It may make you feel better to comb the house for hidden bottles. You may feel righteous pouring the drinker's stash down the sink. This will not deter the drinker for long.There's always a way to get more.  It will only set him/her against you. Besides, do you really want them driving to the store? Probably not.

4. Do NOT believe the drinker's promises. They may be said in all sincerity (or just to get you to back off). However, they are hollow. Again, once that thirst kicks in, an ocean full of booze isn't big enough to quench it.

Things you CAN do

1. Enlist the help of the people you met at the AA meetings. Ask them to do what's called a "12-step" call. This means they will come and meet with the drinker and share their own stories. The alcoholic-to-alcoholic, peer-to-peer bond is magical.

2. Give the Big Book to the drinker and suggest (never demand) that he/she read it.

3. Offer to take the drinker to an AA meeting. Schedules should be readily available online. Hard copies are available at all meetings.

4. Set your boundaries. Decide what you are/are not willing to tolerate. If the person's drinking is negatively impacting your quality of life, know that you do NOT have to live that way. You can reclaim your life. Tell the person you will no longer (fill in the blank). This might include:

--- talk to them on the phone when they're drunk

--- let them crash at your house

--- give them money

---let them be alone with their kids or grandkids

---whatever other consequences will be meaningful and put them on notice that you mean business

Once you make the boundaries clear, don't back down. And don't let them manipulate you into backing down -- they WILL try! Remember, they're desperate.